So I have got the laptop out today and I am going through my messages on the dating site I joined. I have decided to write my thoughts as I go through and give you some input on how my brain works. This might be easier with bullet points….


  • “Mmmmmmm” – yeah, how about no, that just makes me feel unclean
  • “better now I have heard from you” – vom
  • this one looks ok, although he lives quite a way away.. bit too “fit” – might move on
  • next profile is empty apart from an about me that says “come and say hello” – no
  • what does it mean when someone says “professional”?!, hit man, office worker, manwhore? – out of my age range. No.
  • either he’s at a weird angle or his nipples are very uneven. not chunky enough – next
  • interesting looking cock, stumpy but thick, 18?! toooooo young. also face pic looks a bit psychotic
  • 2 guys in a row calling me sexy.. I have a name!! Reject – reject
  • oops, had been chatting to this guy and forgot to reply
  • has a partner – nope
  • just an “x” as a message.. I’m so hot for you *eyes rolling*
  • married – nope
  • oooh this one I blocked the last time I was on here, I don’t think he remembers me… “I get turned on just looking at u, can I cum fuck u please” – well, at least you said please….. no
  • I do not understand this message – no
  • “hey, what brings you here” ummmm I have a profile – read it Mrmystery (I wish I was kidding)
  • Been chatting to this one, seems ok, not overwhelmed so far though, I’ll keep pushing through
  • oooh ooooh oooh this is the guy I like, message message message!!!
  • yes, big boobs are awesome
  • no skype, no dirty chat, I want actual contact!! 340 miles away – nope
  • hmm, you are another one I can’t make my mind up on…
  • how hard is it to fill in a profile, really?!
  • eugh don’t send me a message and put the whole text in the subject line, that’s just lazy
  • I’m automatically suspicious if the relationship status is not filled in, makes me think you are trying to hide something.

So there’s some insight for you. Looking back over it i think i’m a bit picky, maybe a bit too quick to dismiss, but I am a believer in instinct and gut feeling! Anyone agree, or think i have been too harsh? Let me know in the comments 🙂

8 thoughts on “Mmmmmmm

      1. It is fun for the most part. Mainly cos I do view it as work and therefore have better tolerance than I would in real life… real life I have none! Lol


      2. lol I just love the mental image it gives me, I love a contrast and can just see someone sat in a jumper and jeans responding to
        “What are you wearing” with “oooh stockings and crotchless panties…”

        Liked by 1 person

      3. Actually I never do that……I always tell the truth.even if I’m in a jumper and jeans! There’s a reason for feel that you’re being truthful. They aren’t stupid enough to think you’re sat there in stockings waiting for them. So my way actually helps cos they ring back as they trust me. …. Even though I don’t play along when they think I do

        Liked by 1 person

  1. Hey there I was reading this and gave some good thought to what you have written. I am so easy going that nothing really can put me off my stride ! I like the comments and so many of us ‘ Men ‘ can learn form them , I have an understanding of the woman’s psyche already ( sounds hard to believe ) and know and can comprehend some difficult decisions made. However a few hear have made me think a little more 😊


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